Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Slowly but Surely


So I'm reading what I wrote in my last chapter to see what needs revision, and I'm a little disturbed that I don't remember writing parts of it. I mean, it's the chapter I wrote most recently, not quite two months ago, so you'd think my memory of it would be better. At least it isn't bad writing. But man, I must have been half asleep when I was trying to finish it. Or maybe what's happening here is that, feeling brain-dead the way I have been for several weeks now, I'm shocked that I was so articulate just a few weeks earlier.

Anyway, still slowly chipping away at it. Not sure if I'll finish before noon today but at least I don't have to edit much more. I should be done sometime today. I've decided to be zen about the rest of it and not stress (too much) about all of the little things I can't get to. As I've been told, "a good dissertation is a done dissertation."

I managed to get half an hour of sleep earlier, but surprisingly I'm not feeling like a total zombie ... yet. My dear friend E offered to babysit my son for quite a few hours (no mean feat since she's got three of her own), which was super helpful. I'm deeply thankful for my family and friends who are being so generous with babysitting and so supportive of me. I couldn't do this without them, and that's a fact.

xo, Gladys

Monday, July 28, 2014

Still at It


Not gonna lie. There should be a cartoon writer with tears and maybe sweat streaming, pouring down its face. I'm not really crying (only a little bit), but it's almost outrageous how long this is taking. I honestly thought the draft I had to revise was basically finished. Either I was wrong or my brain is really slow this month. Maybe both.

So I had promised to get this latest draft in to my advisers by today or tomorrow. Well, today sure as hell ain't happening (I haven't slept), and tomorrow is iffy because of how long each chapter is taking to revise. Not quite done with the third chapter and I still have one more chapter to go, which is the one that needs the most help. Plus I have to finish the introduction, conclusion, and acknowledgments (which is arguably one of the hardest things to write). Argh. Argh argh argh.

Anyway, sorry to keep complaining about this project, but it honestly helps to write these quick missives. I get some of the whine out of my system and I'm a little freer to go back to the dissertation with an open mind.

xo, Gladys

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Now Writing Gibberish

That is all.

Wait, that's not all: I need more sleep.

Also, revising is evil. Thank you, that's it.


xo, Gladys

Friday, July 25, 2014

At Work

"Gladys working on her dissertation"
Fun progress meter found here


Argh. I honestly wanted to come back here and share photos of my Yellowstone vacation with you. I still might, eventually. But that post (which requires me to spend a chunk of time editing the photos) has to give way to finishing my dissertation, which is due very, very soon.

The dissertation is almost finished, but I'm at that point where I'm so close to yet too far from being done. That's me above right now, freaking out over how to wrangle this thing that is, yes, metaphorically sticking its tongue out at me. I sent away my husband and son to Legoland for today and tomorrow, but I've seriously wasted the day doing chores and getting on the Internet (damn you, Benedict Cumberbatch, why are you always doing something in front of cameras looking shockingly gorgeous like a real-life Michelangelo sculpture!). I have so many ideas and notes that I have to incorporate, but I haven't been able to bring myself to go through this damn thing again. Though it's not as long as many dissertations I've seen, my brain is no longer in shape so I get tired quickly these days (okay, I'm just getting old). I want to honor the feedback I was generously given by a fantastic group of readers, including my committee members who are the ones that need to sign off on the thesis, but at the same time I just want to be DONE. Feel me?

Anxiously yours,
Gladys

{On a more serious, somber note, I've been following the horrific events in Gaza. With the world training its eyes on the killing and maiming and terrorizing of children, women, and men under occupation in that part of the world, I can't help but think of the connections with my own work right now. Although my project looks at American colonialism in the Philippines in the early 20th century, empire and militarism look similar everywhere, anytime.}

Monday, June 30, 2014

I Got the Green Light



Just wanted to share that I officially got the green light from my dissertation committee to revise and file by summer's end! Omg you don't know what a relief that is. It's also exciting. I AM ALMOST DONE WITH THIS! Plus it's quite validating personally. I'd forgotten that I'm actually good at doing certain things, which gave me pleasure, a long time ago, before settling down and having a kid. And more importantly, it's also a reminder that these things -- raising a child and pursuing my love of writing/researching -- don't have to be mutually exclusive.... Of course, I knew that in theory, but not necessarily in practice.

Again, this is not an academic blog; I'm just journaling (part of) the journey. And if you're like me, you probably like to know how things end.

(BTW, currently finishing up the Hunger Games trilogy, in preparation for watching the second film in the franchise. Almost done with the last book, which I find the most interesting so far. Most of the people in my life like the last book the least, but then, I'm fascinated by politics.)

More to come soon on how my June went. I'm still editing vacation photos. Happy last night of June.

xo, Gladys

P.S. This also happened in June! Not as exciting as getting my dissertation green-lighted, but definitely a highlight. LOLNERD


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